Whether we want to acknowledge it or not, the end of another year is almost upon us. That means mince pies and mulled wine (for those who like them), scarves, hats, gloves & winter coats, crackling fires, hot chocolate, new and quickly broken resolutions and of course, Christmas.
And what comes with Christmas? The obligatory giving and receiving of gifts and, if you're lucky, Santa might deem you to have been good and you might get everything on your list.
For me, picking out Christmas gifts (or gifts of any kind), is a personal experience. The process of buying something which I know the recipient will love because I've done my homework, fills me with a sense of satisfaction surpassed only by the actual giving itself.
I have always loved giving gifts. My family has, for the past few years, done Secret Santa, which has its advantages and disasvantages for me. I feel deprived of the opportunity to pick out the perfect gift for the people who I love most in this world, but... the obvious 'but' is that it is the most economic way to deal with Christmas for a family who is spread across the globe.
The same can be said for friends who I buy gifts for. A few of my friends are away from home at this time of year and it takes all of our combined strength not to get predictably down when we don't get the chance to spend it with all of our family. Picking out the perfect present for them makes me feel as if I've eased the burden of not being surrounded by family a little for them.
But there is a flipside. There are some people in my life for whom receiving a present from me has no greater meaning than a simple expectation. No thanks. No appreciation for the thought process which goes into picking a really good gift out, but simply a once-a-year air kiss across the miles to say 'hey, I'm here and even though I haven't acknowledged you this entire year, I'd like my present please'. Why must I spend my hard-earned money on people like this?
The answer is simple. Because it is expected and to not do so would be deemed rude.
Any present I buy for people like this would be completely generic and have no thought put into it at all. And that's not because I can't be bothered, but simply because I don't know these people. Not for lack of trying. No effort is ever made on their part to have anything to do with my life. No happy birthday. No 'hey, how are you?'. No acknowledgement of invitations carefully thought about. But... always a massive load of Christmas presents. Without fail. Why?
It's a really sensitive issue and quite a subjective one. This isn't about naming and shaming. I'm talking more broadly about the institution of gift giving and how it has, unfortunately, become an expectation to spend money on people I wouldn't ordinarily have much to do with, but because of some vague and displaced sense of responsibility, I do. Because I'm THAT person. The one who doesn't like to cause ripples, who bows gracefully to expectation and plods along with the status quo because it's easier than admitting out loud that the whole process is fundamentally flawed.
Wouldn't it be nice to be able to rid my life of people like this by simply not conforming. Hmmm... maybe something to consider for next year's resolutions!
And what comes with Christmas? The obligatory giving and receiving of gifts and, if you're lucky, Santa might deem you to have been good and you might get everything on your list.
For me, picking out Christmas gifts (or gifts of any kind), is a personal experience. The process of buying something which I know the recipient will love because I've done my homework, fills me with a sense of satisfaction surpassed only by the actual giving itself.
I have always loved giving gifts. My family has, for the past few years, done Secret Santa, which has its advantages and disasvantages for me. I feel deprived of the opportunity to pick out the perfect gift for the people who I love most in this world, but... the obvious 'but' is that it is the most economic way to deal with Christmas for a family who is spread across the globe.
The same can be said for friends who I buy gifts for. A few of my friends are away from home at this time of year and it takes all of our combined strength not to get predictably down when we don't get the chance to spend it with all of our family. Picking out the perfect present for them makes me feel as if I've eased the burden of not being surrounded by family a little for them.
But there is a flipside. There are some people in my life for whom receiving a present from me has no greater meaning than a simple expectation. No thanks. No appreciation for the thought process which goes into picking a really good gift out, but simply a once-a-year air kiss across the miles to say 'hey, I'm here and even though I haven't acknowledged you this entire year, I'd like my present please'. Why must I spend my hard-earned money on people like this?
The answer is simple. Because it is expected and to not do so would be deemed rude.
Any present I buy for people like this would be completely generic and have no thought put into it at all. And that's not because I can't be bothered, but simply because I don't know these people. Not for lack of trying. No effort is ever made on their part to have anything to do with my life. No happy birthday. No 'hey, how are you?'. No acknowledgement of invitations carefully thought about. But... always a massive load of Christmas presents. Without fail. Why?
It's a really sensitive issue and quite a subjective one. This isn't about naming and shaming. I'm talking more broadly about the institution of gift giving and how it has, unfortunately, become an expectation to spend money on people I wouldn't ordinarily have much to do with, but because of some vague and displaced sense of responsibility, I do. Because I'm THAT person. The one who doesn't like to cause ripples, who bows gracefully to expectation and plods along with the status quo because it's easier than admitting out loud that the whole process is fundamentally flawed.
Wouldn't it be nice to be able to rid my life of people like this by simply not conforming. Hmmm... maybe something to consider for next year's resolutions!
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